Check out some pics!

The 2 five year old twin boys at the orphanage, Elias and Eli. They have so much energy that it's incredible! So cute that I can barely handle it. But really. It's also been funny to see how different they are!

A few of the girls and a couple of the boys at the orphanage:  (from left) Jonathan, Heidi, Enma, Nayelis, Emeli (daughter of the girls' tía), and Bryan. 

Guitar lessons we do with the women of the Casa Hogar Vida community. Maria is on the left, we just celebrated her 15th birthday with her. Aleyda is on the right, she was really excited about learning guitar so that the women can worship at their Sunday small group. She's learned so much! Melissa is in the middle teaching, her and I have been working together and it's been so fun!

This little guy...Christopher. He is the freaking cutest. He's three and loves to talk constantly. He's got such a sad story (all the kids at the orphanage do) but is a good kid. He's got the most expression filled eyes and Kayli (on the left) loves his post-nap face. So much fun to work with Kayli too, she cracks me up and is so full of love for the kids!

More to come later!

Peace & Blessings

Moving Ahead

Some really super stuff has been happening with me in regards to my relationship with God, and I'm psyched about it- so I needed to tell you all!

About midway through last week, my heart was feeling heavy with all the things I hadn't taken to God in so long. See, I have this problem with asking for help- I suppose not too much in general, like with people (okay, you got me, sometimes...), but definitely from God. For so long I've thought that I have to do so much myself, get myself so far, bring myself close enough to God that he will help me do the rest. But that's just not the way it works. We need God to help us get to Him. Which seems a litle strange but hey, we're just humans. So anyways, this other night I felt like I needed to present all of this to Him and just let go of it all...so I did. There were tears but it was good and I finally started feeling this peace He gives and the freedom that comes along with living with Him.

Now I've been craving time with Him, been excited about being in the Word and praying and learning more about Him. It's so cool, guys!

The biggest thing I asked help with, that I'm going to ask you guys to pray for me for as well, is pride. I struggle so much with it...and personally, I think it's at the heart of all sin. I was talking to another person here about it, specifically about how we hate that prideful thoughts clog our minds. It's just so awful to experience them when we know that they are false thoughts. So I asked God to help take those thoughts away and change me for the better. Prayers for that please?

Another thing. This thought came to me in the shower last night (apparently the best place to think, haha). For so many years now, I've been all about (at least on missions trips) getting things done, getting to the endpoint, finishing projects, physical projects for people, but I've never focused much on the relational aspect of it all. I guess I've always thought that we were there to help people by building this, or cleaning out that, or being extra hands for this other thing...but I never focused on getting to know the people around me in any sense more than their name or maybe praying for them once. To me, that has always been the less important, more trivial part of a missions trip. But God is changing that in me...this whole trip, when I thought for me personally would look like a bunch of construction projects, has looked a lot more like building relationships with the kids of an orphanage, the community around it, and people in the church. Wow. And God has shown me how crucial that is, and also how much I've enjoyed it. Yeah, it's a bit harder to build deep relationships when there's some language barrier, or when the people are in such a different culture than you're used to, but maybe that makes it even cooler that we're still able to. I've learned so much...what a church community is supposed to look like. What reaching out to a city is supposed to look like. What living your life for Christ and for the advancement of the Kingdom is supposed to look like...they really do that here. I have rarely seen such faith and such love for our fellow men. It's beautiful.

Not only that, but the 19 LTers here have the chance to bring that back home with us. No, friends, the learning and the mission doesn't stop here, in two weeks when we leave. We have the chance to make this happen wherever we go...because God is with us. My church back in my hometown says it best, in a sign over the door as you walk out:  "You are now entering your mission field." It isn't limited to Choluteca, Honduras, or Altamont, Tennessee, or Coney Island, New York...and even in this case, it's not even limited to just outside the church. It's anywhere a Christian is, because that is where the power of God is in the Holy Spirit. Boom. Awesome.

Anyways, I'm trying to ignore that there are only two weeks left here...And the fact that I don't want to leave. It's going to rip my heart into pieces...I think a part of me will always be here, and I know that someday I will come back to find it. That, my friends, is a promise. Hold me to it. :)

Peace & Blessings

Only three weeks left...

And I wish that there were so many more...

Gosh dang, I love these kids so much. And if I'm being honest, I've never felt more loved while sitting in church when one of the girls is leaning on me while we sing a worship song in Spanish. Even if it's so hot in there that not even the fans are helping. I don't want to leave (everyone back at home called that one, haha), I'd be happy if I could stay here forever and work with the kids and help at the church. I've been thinking about how to become a tia [aunt] to the third orphanage house (currently unoccupied, but they pray every day that we could take in more kids that need it) since the second day of work here.

I mean, back at home I have plans for one semester and then I'm graduated. DONE. With no current plans. Okay, I technically have plans that I've had for a while now but it depends on acceptances and such. It's not in stone. And I've always felt called out of the country- and for longer term...

I want these kids to know that they are loved and that they have a Heavenly Father up above that cares for them and cries to see them in pain. I want the community members to know that there is a power out there that gives them an unbreakable hope, no matter their situation.

This song by Jenny & Tyler just came on while I was typing and it's so true sometimes...(called "Dreaming Of Peace")

it's hard to face reality, so I'll just keep on dreaming
It's plain to see that we don't have the answers
But we think we know and so it goes,
And it's plain to see that we don't have it together
We think we know and so it goes on
While we're standing in the streets
they're fighting off disease
I'm in the comfort of my bed
not dealing with a shred of
this war between nations
and this war against nature
it's a battlefield that I've never seen...

But now I've seen some of it, even if it's just the surface of it all. And I still can't say that I understand it, or have the answers to fix it. But I cannot deny that it is there, it is bad, and it is not right to not do anything about it. We cannot stand by and let our fellow man suffer. This is my proof:  my time here. I hope that it is some proof for you too. There are so many different ways to help, but the biggest is love and prayer. And if you are able to go, GO. Something I've been reminded of so strongly here is how much our stuff, our things, material things, that we cling to are NOT ours.

Biggest news is that the orphanage received a new girl this week!!! Her name is Maybis Gabriela, we call her Gaby. She is nearly 10 years old and she is the most precious. The other kids have been pretty good to her, which is so good to see. Almost makes you forget about her situation when you see her smile...but then there are moments like this. I was sitting with her in her (and other girls') room when we were having a birthday party for one of the other girls. I asked her why she didn't want to join the party and she didn't answer me at first, but looked really sad so I just sat there and held her close. Eventually I asked if she wanted to talk about it, she nodded, so I asked what was going on. And right before she burst into tears, she said that she missed her brothers and sisters...all I could do was shed some tears with her and tell her how much I wished that things were different for her. But that she was safe here and loved. And that I was so sorry...

These little kids have been through so much more than we could imagine in their short time here. It's heartbreaking to hear their stories. Almost all of them are really behind in school because their guardians just didn't care enough to get them there. A lot of them are underdeveloped emotionally, and nearly all are way smaller than they should be due to bad nutrition in the years in which it is most crucial. But their smiles every day are the most beautiful things I have ever seen. And when they care for each other it's hard to believe all they've been through.

Please pray for these kids. Pray for all the LTers here because none of us want to leave these children. Pray for all the soon-to-be parents and that they would take care of the kids. For the mothers who get left, pregnant and alone, because in this culture it can be a sign of "manliness" to get a woman pregnant and then leave. For the fathers, who have left...for their souls. That they would find Jesus...

And pray for my friend Paola here- I can't even begin to talk about her past. She's 22 and has lost her parents and hasn't seen her three younger siblings in 5 years. She's going to see her 10 year old brother today in the hospital to give him blood because he lost a lot in an accident of sorts...she has such a beautiful heart.

Peace & Blessings